About Birth

Refusing the Apple during Loss As Christians, we understand the rich opportunities pregnancy and birth provide for parents to accept Jesus and grow closer to Him.  We see Genesis 3:16 and the promise of procreation and the opportunity to seek the Lord through our birthing experiences.  We see the very first birth, and Eve's response to her experience in Genesis 4:1. Did you know that pregnancy and birth are also tempting times to turn away from God?  Satan can't create people.  This inability to be a part of creation surely makes him jealous, as seen in the Garden of Eden.  He used his cunning and craftiness to single out the woman, to wait until she was alone, and tempt her.  God knew exactly where the woman has the greatest potential to seek Him and serve Him - the same place where she could also encounter the strongest temptation to walk away from Him - a place that calls her to her deepest roots and most foundational beliefs - pregnancy and childbirth. Ten years ago, I became pregnant.  The father of the baby was a boy who I thought over time would begin to grow into the man he should have been.  When he learned that I was pregnant, he wanted me to abort my baby.  A short time later, my son and I fled to the safety of a battered women's shelter.  It was in my pregnancy, that I understood that God allowed me to become a mother.  I accepted Christ, and accepted my role as mother.  I had an uncomplicated pregnancy, an easy birth, and a perfectly healthy baby boy.  But, as I mentioned, I also soon needed safety for us both. Accepting Christ doesn't always mean immediately drastic, wonderful change.  Sometimes the change is revealed in the process. After that experience, I met the man who is now my husband.  I became a doula, coming alongside mothers in their most fertile time of growth, equipping them with practical support during pregnancy and birth, but planting seeds of spiritual support that lasts a lifetime, guiding them to seek and find the Creator of their child, the Author of all things lovely and true. My fourth pregnancy ended with the birth of my miscarried baby.  Only growing for 12 weeks, he was taken Home before I felt the lovely flutters, before I felt him hiccup, before I picked out his very first outfit. In the ultrasound room, I saw his lifeless body bob gently to the ultrasound and I knew that he was gone.  Just as certain as I knew he was gone, however, I was certain God would spark life, speak life, breathe life back into my child.  I watched, intently, simply sure He was going to do this amazing thing.  "This is so scary, God, but it's so neat that You chose me for this!  I can't wait to tell the whole world!  I will give You the glory, God!"  Then, "....Um, God? I'm still waiting.  I'm getting nervous, God....." She shut the machine off.  Darkness. A doctor came into the room, grasped my shoulders firmly, and said, "Now, we need to get that debris out of there..." Pregnancy and birth are rich opportunities to find Christ, and to grow closer to Him.  But they are also tempting times to turn away. I was so very confused.  I was so very disappointed in my God.  I felt so let down, so betrayed, so offended, so wounded.  People around me thought my faith would make things easier on me.  My faith helped me to know where my baby was; my baby was Home.  I was thankful for that, but I was still here.  I was still hurt.  To me, it was still dark. We as Christian birth professionals have an enormous opportunity to come alongside mothers in their most fertile time.  Don't just ask her obstetrical history - ask her about her mothering experiences.  Don't ask her if she's ever miscarried - ask if she's ever given birth to a miscarried or stillborn baby.  And when she endures these experiences under your care, give her as many options as possible.  Give her validation.  Give her love.  Give her the helping hand she will need to stumble through the darkness, to find that flicker of light, and to trust in it, once again. For more information about how to support mothers prior to, during and after birth in any trimester, please visit Still Birth Day Your Sister in Faith, Heidi Faith site creator, Still Birth Day